Saturday, August 6, 2011

Don't Think Pink: The Power of Using Words

I'm always surprised how many people do not understand how to use language properly. Ever since Napoleon Hills great masterpiece "Think and Grow Rich" in 1934 which talks about using a technique called autosuggestion. Autosuggestion is the idea of saying something to yourself with strong positive emotions will attract people and things into your life.Today we'd call autosuggestion affirmatioms.

This idea is also repeated in the bestselling  book by Rhonda Byrnes "The Secret" talks about using the "Law of Attraction" by focusing on what you want till you get inspiration in the form of a plan to get it. Using these techniques will help you understand how to influence yourself and others better. Both these plans outline a similar course of action.


Just to recap what the "Law of Attraction" is very simple. What ever thoughts you give strong emotions too, you create!

Milton Erickson, a famous hypnotist who was modeled by Richard Bandler and John Grinder who created NLP. Dr. Richard Bandler and  John Grinder heard of this great hypnotist because of his ability to create profound change in a small amount of time.

One of the techniques employed by Milton Erickson  was negation. If a great hypnotist such as Milton Erickson is using negation pattern so well to the effect he did. How is is it that people use negation to create behaviors in themselves and others they do not want? Why don't people just frame things in the positive?

Hypnotists such as Milton Erickson have understood human nature very well to the point that they understand that we  use our memories positively. That is to say we usually associate into behaviors unconsciously when suggested. If that experience is suggested over and over again, a person will start to practice it in their mind and that leads to doing it in normal waking consciousness.

One example that pops to mind is a machinist who was teaching people who were new to the job how operate the machinery. In his demo of using the equipment, he'd demonstrate how not to use the equipment.  Some time later, the instructor had the same mishap he'd been demonstrating to people how to avoid.

If our experience is positive, then anything we suggest to move away from will always have the gravity to to keep us moving towards that experience, even if framed negatively such as in the case of the the instructor above can have such disastrously bad results. Why do we still do it?


This might sound simple,but if you pay attention to the type of language you use when you ask something. Are you really telling them to do specifically what you want or did you frame what you didn't want as the action to avoid?

Here are a few statements framed negatively and their approipiate suggested positive command:


A.     Don't forget your purse please.

        Please remember your purse. 


B.    Don't talk back to me!

       Talk to me with respect! 


C.    I don't want to go see a movie today.

       I want to enjoy the weather while it's nice.


D.    I don't want to stay in.

        I want to go out tonight. 




2. Use your voice effectively.

Since you were born, you were programmed to know what your mother meant when she said your name with different tempos, volumes and tones. You could know if your mom was angry, sad, contemplative etc. The use of tone is used by all living mammals. Use it to your advantage!


A.   Commands - When you give a command, your voice tone should go down in pitch.



B.   Statements - This type of communication has a level tone.


C.   Questions -   Questions end with the tone of a persons voice going up.


3.  Decide on which type of communication would be best.

This is is the area whee you need to figure out who your audience is and know how they will respond to command. Are they going to respond best to your command as a  question or as a command? Now that you have decided on that you can now decide whether or not you want to add a negation to your command or question. Remember the mind experiences your command or question and adds the negation after you've experienced what the communicator wanted.

Now to add a subtle level of sophistication to your  communication phrase your commands like questions, but add the command tone to the question.

Just to recap this this article and what you  learned is that the proponents of the law of attraction state we should say things to affirm our goals in the positive. In addition great hypnotists such as Milton Erickson would use suggestions framed positively and negatively to achieve specific results.

Hopefully now I've you to the tools to improve your ability to create the life you want through proper use of language. Enjoy!



Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Enjoy Life!!!

I really didn't know what to post for my first entry, but recent events have made it clear what I should talk about. I recently lost a friend due to a car accident in Calgary. I was looking to reacquainted with her when things slowed down for me. I had added her my Facebook account in preparation for that event someday soon.

 On July 22nd/2011. My friends car went through a rural stop and their Jetta was hit by an oncoming Semi truck. My friend was killed! I will never have the chance to get reacquainted with her now. Unfortunately we can't change the past!

What is the point? Life is to short to worry about making money or trying to please your boss. No one on their deathbed wishes they could have had more money or  had more things. What do people want? People want many people to call them friends and to have had the respect of those friends and family. They might have wished they pushed themselves a bit more outside their comfort zone so they truly appreciate the journey they've undertaken. Then they can say I did that!

An exercise of looking at how people see you at your own funeral is a good start.

Step 1
 
Imagine your at your funeral and listen to all your family and friends talk about you. Listen to what they share when they speak of their  experiences with you they've enjoyed with you and the qualities they respected about you and goals you've accomplished.

Step 2

Write down the thoughts on a piece of paper and read everyday.

Step 3

Plan your year around those goals. Start with your long range goals! Choose only 5! I can not stress that enough. Plan your life with time for life's' little surprises. Break those 5 goals into smaller medium term goals of 6 and 3 months. Then take those break them into weekly goals, then finally into daily goals.


Step 4

Implement.


Step 5

Notice problems and reassess your goals.